There's Klezmer

i was at the CD release party of "Mazel means good luck" from the Metropolitan Klezmer at the Eldridge Museum last night. Hanukkah begins tonight. This year i knew when it began.

Day 3, 4 and 5

Day 3: I did not get to see Tom Wopat and John Schneider, formerly of the Dukes of Hazard tv show, sing their Home For Christmas album at the Barnes and Noble. I really wanted to see them. Day 4: Nothing christmasy. Day 5: Researching new christmas movies. The Reindeer Games was on a list. That is not a christmas movie. I am still yelling 'I want my movie and my money'. This is yelling at the Reindeer Games. I'm having a dream with Ben Affleck. There's no: "you want your money?" like that. Threatening the Reindeer Games.

Day 2 of the 25 days of Christmas

It's raining. Day 1: It was raining at the tree lighting.

December 1st is my Christmas start date

Day 1: Today I viewed my first decorated tree of the season at a coffee shop. Let the dating begin.

Abstraction sculpture Georgia O'keeffe

Sex toy jokes were made. "It's her dildo!" It is a joke.

No Mailing address currently

Do not send at last address posted.

Martin Short at Barnes and Noble

Launching his new book: I must Say. Funny! A canadian! Jiminy Glick not inspired by my father! I laughed hysterically. Also, He did voices. Doing voices.

Joy Behar begins Me, My Mouth and I at the Cherry Lane

Joy Behar will entertain you at the Cherry Lane theater in the West village starting thursday November 6th until December 21st.

Mammogram on the last day of breast cancer awareness month

There is no mammogram today because it is a manogram. I was supposed to have a mammogram mid month and did not go through with it because i did not like the machine. You feel as though you are going to be injured during this exam. I once saw a sign in a hospital that read: 'manogram'. I am looking for an alternative.

The spy tech is over

over.

I said: I'm changing my last name"

The ra with the last name of a baseball player said after i said to her "last name, .....?: "I'm changing my last name."

The ra named after a baseball player

She came in the room in the morning and said to us: "You look like mummies."

I want to get paid if you keep taking my ideas

Pay me.

Please stop sending up the send up of foreigner on my blog

Did i ask you to? NO.

I would appreciate it if people would stop making it with me

Respectfully, like the person that just came up to me. No thank you again.

Shouting at democratic workers to get greencards

She shouted at democratic caseworkers to get greencards and to rename greencard. She quoted Hilda Solis of the justice department: "You don't need to be a U.S. Citizen."

It's a prop

Wearing my uncle sam hat: "It's a prop."

It's a halloween costume

Wearing my uncle sam hat as a halloween costume.

Party for the people published

Let's have a party when it's over.

Wearing a band aid.

Resident 68 is wearing a band aid. They laughed at me for looking over angrily. She said there was no need to be angry about the band aid.

Showering as a ghoul or a goblin

with a white mask.

The auditions are over for the counterpeople

To the people behind the counter: You will not be in something.

To the group laughing at me:

Goodbye. To the people coming up to me: goodbye.

She's going on Wor

Getting rid of the wor i came up with. But did they understand the wor? Then she said " I wor it, " despite my proclamation to not use wor for it. " She said it for it. She said it for the play. She wor it for a driver's license. She wor it on Wor the radio channel and demanded driver's licenses and green cards. She wor it to old navy wearing rocawear saying it's black owned and demanding driver's licenses.

The threat play is over

To the people thinking they are on a threat play: no thank you. The threat play is over. I will write the threat play myself.

Goodbye Marie

We didn't like you for the mattresses.

Suddenly my talking pumpkin was boring

Compared to the carved pumpkin you can have sex with on funny or die.com

My swindian speak

Swedish and indian.

There's Cinderella for it

Yesterday, i was in the audience for Cinderella. A few actors looked over. Let's end actors looking over for the play. The production was a comical interpretation of the classic fairy tale. There were elaborate sets and costumes; acrobatics; and songs. Sherri Sheperd perked up throughout her performance as the wicked stepmother (here called madame) played with fervor. The entire cast was superb.

ra

ra: "i haven't seen you all day. hra came by. talk to the social work supervisor." He made it up?!

The Laundry song

Could i write a song about laundry? Or would it have to be someone like...a musical theater lyricist... I really need to wash. Is anyone at laundry? I needed a rhyme with wash. The ra is Josh?

a project for the housing specialist

a townhouse.

A list and a producer for the worker

I wanted to protect the rights of myself and my contributors , so i gave the workers names and a name of a producer : will ferrell.

signing up contributors with workers

The voices are over

Sex and hiv education

to milla: " Why do i need to learn how to put a condom on, i need to learn how to find a man first! Teach us how to find a man!" Milla:" I know, I'm 52..." "I thought you were 60?!" " I am."

You heard me?

"I can't get in to the senior residence. You heard me?" smiling.

We're dreaming with Ben Affleck

It sounded like Rosie O'Donnell's voice.

Perusing Edna St-Vincent Millay poems

Witch-Wife and others... Did she really write a poem titled Witch-Wife? Bringing Edna St-Vincent Millay's poems to life on stage. Maybe,that is my next project. Would like to see the Belle of Amherst currently on stage.

Martin luther King

There is a picture of Martin Luther King on the wall. I'm still dreaming!

Film about Snowed in couple

Actors: Miles Teller, Analeigh Tipton... Starts today. Preview Screening 1 week ago. Press email asked of reviewers to not review until opening day. 4 days ago. Pr asstant: "What did you tbink of the film?" The review is in: Two young people find each over the internet and find a relationship stranded during a New York snow storm; this is the story of Two Night Stand which should really be renamed Cyberdating works! In my world, it would not! They play little games with each other like getting a plunger from the neighbor's apartment. It's frolicky phrasy fun.

A bible

The assistant director said only the bible on the locker. Revising the Republican thing. Several of our group disagreed. We had to petition. In the end we did not have to have the bible.

Finally publishing a whoopin

it was several whoopins before i published it. Resident 127 yelled 'whoever touches my things is gonna get a whoopin.' She got us a "whoopin". It was an expression i had heard many times.

I had to move on from the wills

I had to move on from the wills; not move out with it. I had to find other actors - possibly republicans. Oh no, they grunted about that too! ... A resident grunted.

I told Joy about my blogs

Also, I wrote down my blogs for Joy and gave the piece of paper to her.

The supervisor

The supervisor: "You don't have to look for a producer."

The growler again

The Growler: "She's publishing it for us."

B and her spirits

They didn't like my mumbling. I mumbled getting in the spirit with spirits like a Hennessy. B the ra enters and recounts a story of how the spirits visit her and her husband; The spirits of children.

Vero and Vibe Make a porno

Vero and Vibe brought in an erotic toy and took a picture with their smart phone in the tv room and laughed together. I stopped for Vibe and told her i liked her art she made with Vero.

I had a dream

I had a dream with Ben Affleck in it. I had no idea what this meant. I consulted a dream analysis kiosk at a book fair. .... resident 139 had a dream a pimp approached her.

Olivia twist

More twist donuts please. I thought of Olivia Twist When I first got some money after not having any money and ate my first twist donut.

Joy Behar at the Cherry lane tomorrow

Joy Behar, former co-host on the View is treating the Greenwich village to a free reading at the Cherry Lane theater of her most recent work: Me, My Mouth and I. (2 p.m.) I had the great opportunity to listen to Joy at last week's reading and laughed the whole way through. Her title amused me because a while ago i had said to myself that i would like to write a piece called Motor Mouth. Behar's piece is like an aspirational autobiography taking us back to her childhood, through college and marriage(s) and onto the comedic stage and tv. She shares with us her name before marriage (birth name): Chiuto. I am making a joke (for Joy) that i am nicknaming her Joy Chianti because: 1) We discover she is of Italian heritage and has many funny stories about that. Also she likes wine (albeit,white wine). (Take that Bob Saget with His Uta Hagen Dazs that i actually came up with before him). You must reserve at: company@cherrylanetheatre.org

There's a mister softee intrumental through it

Mister Softee is outside. I hear the music.

Will Ferrell on youtube interviewed by skysports at the US Open (tennis)

He is acting like a rich yachter with a beard and bushy eyebrows while interviewed by skysports. The wills : they include Will ferrell, will arnett, will smith, will forte,... Economic justice: a salary for the blogger.

Not Seeking $ donations - desperate - NO mailing address

Hello Pinkgrapefruit and homegals readers, I am desperately seeking $ donations. Please support my endeavor as a blogger and publisher. 1 $ (dollars) , 5 $ (dollars) and over are greatly appreciated. I am in great need of income. However, currently i have no mailing address.

James Spader on Coney Island

Yesterday, The Black List was shooting a scene for un upcoming episode. They were set up on the Boardwalk. I noticed the pa's and the cameras, but no James Spader. I made a joke: "he's on the cyclone". Soon after, he appeared in what seemed to be a grey suit and a hat butting out. He sat on a bench alone with an actor and shot a scene. He then sat alone and looked seriously out at the ocean as a huge helicopter flew over the water; at which point i began to laugh hysterically because days earlier as i lay on the beach several helicopters and planes that appeared to be military flew over the water. The real mystery is who had the idea for the scene with James Spader and the helicopter. Who contacted the Black list people? The Black List people have agreed to this scene for my film.??

She walked in the room and said

"I want to be a chef." "She's on pinkgrapefruit again."

A recent visit to luna park

The Ghost Hole at Coney Island. Spooky!

The group sang

The group on the bench sang: 'Oops, there it is.' To which i responded: 'Poops, there it is.'; or rather, ' Proops, there it is.'

The sprinklers

Remember Will Ferrell waking up to sprinklers on his lawn in Everything Must Go. Well, I woke up to sprinklers Will, on the lawn at the highline.

Violet at the Whitney

Jeff Koons sculpture on view at the Whitney (part of retrospective) until October. "I'm a nun."

There are many "do you have 50 cents'?

"Do you have 50 cents?" me: " No, but if they keep asking me i will have to call fitty cent up." They left their fifty scents.

Seinfeld's next girlfriends? joke !

After Midnight with K.D. Lang and Dule - the Musical

I had a thrilling afternoon at the Matinee of After Midnight starring Dule Hill (of my show Psych) and guest star K.D Lang of 'I have an unbelievably amazing and transcendental voice' fame. I stood outside and hoped that someone had an extra ticket. A woman in the lobby did. She had an extra ticket so she gave me it and i entered with her. I was already pretty 'psyched' to see Dule live but the presence of K.D. made it even more exciting. The woman seemed to agree. I wished for 6 songs out of K.D. . We got 4. The first one was mesmerizing: 'I can't give you anything but love' (Dorothy Fields and Jimmy Mchugh). Dule was the first on stage introducing us to the world after midnight of the jazz age Harlem Cotton Club. Out came dancers in flapper costumes kicking high and doing the splitz; tap dancers; a chorus of singers led by the Jazz at Lincoln Center All Stars; and a lot of Duke Ellington. The whole production was simply dazzling and very entertaining. Several songs were exquisite and the cast was very acrobatic, jumping off tables, doing backflips - very impressive. The grand finale left the audience on a really high note. K.D Lang is with the cast until March 9th. At the Brooks Atkinson theater.

Darrell Hammond continued

Darrell really made me laugh when he put taken out in a strait jacket and colonoscopy together . More on that later.

It's valentine's with her

I am never invited out to Valentine's Dinner. The last time i got a valentine's chocolate box, I had to buy it myself (on sale). It's Valentine's again, on Friday, we are forced to endure it. Happy Valentine's to all the long-term single gals!