Well Red - The Knew Enlightenment

When your mother starts examining the clothes you're wearing, you know you're in trouble. She's not looking at them for the usual suspects - holes and unwashed stains - she's looking at them for signs they were made in a sweatshop. I think the lefties may have abducted my mother and replaced her with a clone with a conscience. I'm not sure what's going on - but a fight ensued. They may be punishing me for the sarong story. Somebody may have handed her a copy of No Logo. Who knows? They have not come forward with their demands. Needless to say, my mother is not the protesting kind - she has only recently discovered the reusable shopping bag.

It may have something to do with the fact that the anti-cheap brigade - a small group of protestors - believed you should practice what you preach. Like Diana said, my source on my cheap labor story, If you're not wearing clothes made out of your bedspreads or shopping at Canadian Apparel, they don't like you. Indeed, making clothes out of sheets had become a bit of a trend. That could explain a lot of things, I thought. I had never really stopped to check whether my clothes were clean, as they called sweatshop free, as there were too many sales. But after a lot of "Did you know?" , as in these women work 15 hour days, these women make in a month, what you make in a day, did you know a river was polluted to make this dress, etc., the guilt does start to creep in. I won't ever walk into Canadian Apparel and ask if they ever have any sales, like I did last Boxing Day.

It could also explain the rise in marxist-leninist customer service representatives who are not exactly thrilled when you ask them if there are any sales. Or bumper stickers with the words Well Red.

I caught a glimpse of such a bumper sticker jogging down the street the other day. I thought I was back in California - the capital of bumper stickers. Well Red. I could only view this as an affront. They must have read my Red Rage column and decided to retaliate. It's a play on words: well read. As in, liberal arts educated people are well read. So and so is well read - it is intended as a compliment. I once admired somone for being well read. Well red, I assumed meant being informed about social justice. Project Red came to mind. The movie Reds. Suddenly the image of Bono and Warren Beatty being mad at me caused me great anxiety and I thought hard to come up with my own bumper sticker.

"Knew and improved" was what I came up. I'm sticking it on my mailbox. I doubt, however, I will ever wear my bedspreads any time soon.


Pinkgrapefruit
30% fun, 70% conscientious. or
30 % conscientious, 70 % fun